Part Thirty-Six
Haldir looked around the campfire at the assembled company. Almost all of them had
paired off in one way or another, he noted. Orophin and Amroth, Rúmil and Arwen,
himself and Legolas… Elrond sat with Erestor, who kept looking the Lord of Imladris
over with the concern of a mother hen. Haldir vaguely entertained the thought that Erestor
might secretly have feelings for Elrond, but he could not imagine anything ever passing
between them.
Only Thranduil sat alone, but he seemed at peace with this as he roasted a brace of
pheasants over the fire. It smelled delicious and Haldir could not wait for it to be done.
The Elvenking of Mirkwood glanced up at him and grinned, displaying fine, even white
teeth. The firelight glinted in his hair. He was one of the most beautiful elves Haldir had
ever seen… but his son far outshone him. Legolas rested casually against Haldir now,
looking lost in thought. Almost no one had spoken at all during the past hour. All seemed
content to simply relax and recover from the day's events.
Orophin sat with Amroth lying across his lap, looking noble despite his prone position.
The lost king looked fully alive now, Haldir thought. He was indistinguishable in color and
vigor from the rest of them. No one would ever know what he had been through, today
and before, or that he was the oldest elf here, older even than Elrond. Orophin was
stroking Amroth's long golden hair contentedly.
Oro had been horrified when Amroth had stepped into the glen and vanished. Haldir and
Rúmil had to physically restrain him from going after him. Haldir wondered what would
have happened if Oro had followed, but not enough to have allowed his brother any risk.
For hours had they stayed there keeping vigil over the wood until a sound of weeping had
filled the air.
When Nimrodel's voice had sounded on the wind, Elrond had vanished into the clearing as
well. His body was not there as it had been earlier. There was simply nothing. Haldir had
prepared himself to stop Erestor and Arwen if they tried to go after him, but Erestor had
stood there frozen, wringing his hands, and Arwen had sobbed into Rúmil's shoulder.
Before any of them could get over the shock or formulate a plan, the pair of them had
returned.
Amroth had been unconscious for a few minutes, and Elrond had been violently ill. They
had all removed themselves back to the campsite of the night before to see to the two of
them. They still had not spoken yet of what had occurred in the clearing, except to say
that it was ended. They had the answers they had been seeking and were ready to return to
Lothlórien in the morning.
Rúmil and Legolas had rebuilt the fire and Thranduil had disappeared to hunt some food.
Elrond had sent Haldir to find a certain herb to calm his nausea, which had been located
quickly. He had mixed a small potion for himself and a restorative for Amroth, which had
been fed to him when he had come around. They both appeared to be fine, now.
Haldir was curious to hear what had passed in the clearing, but the happiness of his
brothers was far more important to him, and he concerned himself with divining a solution
to the issues which were bound to rise when they returned home. If Amroth chose to stay
in Lórien, then Orophin would be well enough. It would be the burden of Galadriel to find
a place for the previous king among her people. If Amroth chose to leave, there would be
nothing Haldir could do to stop him.
Orophin would want to go with him, Haldir supposed. Could he stop him? Haldir did not
wish to be split apart from either of his brothers. They were his only family. He could not
imagine a day passing without seeing them, joking with them, patrolling the borders with
them. Still, Haldir knew he could not forbid Orophin a chance at love and happiness. Oro
did not give his heart lightly. This was no mere fling. It was serious.
If Oro left, would Rúmil then go, too? They were nigh inseparable. Haldir knew that
Rúmil could not sleep those rare nights when Orophin's duties took him out of the talan.
Sometimes Rúmil would come and bunk with Haldir, but he would toss and turn until
dawn. If both of them departed Lórien with Amroth, Haldir would be devastated, but he
could not go himself. He was Marchwarden, and he had duties from which he would not
ask to be released.
This brought him to his own situation with Legolas. Thranduil would eventually take him
back to Mirkwood, and it might be centuries before they saw each other again. Still,
Haldir tried to take heart in the fact that he knew Legolas was devoted to him. There
would be no bitter parting this time. He had to enjoy what time they might have left and
hope Legolas could convince his father to extend their visit in Lórien for as long as
possible.
There still remained the issue of Rúmil's 'engagement' to Arwen, but Haldir would leave
that to Rúmil to sort out himself. He was convinced that the pair of them were not truly
committed to the idea of commitment, and sooner or later they would have to admit it.
The pheasants finished cooking and Thranduil began to parcel them out. Haldir accepted a
large portion of the roast bird and wished again that he lived in Mirkwood. Everyone ate
hungrily, even Legolas, whom Haldir had never seen take more than two or three bites of
anything. Finally Elrond set the bones of his dinner aside, wiped his fingers discreetly on
the grass, and cleared his throat.
"I am sorry that we have no wine," Thranduil said.
"As am I," said Elrond, "But not likely as sorry as you are. Thank you, Thranduil, for this
excellent and much needed dinner. It seems to me that you all must be wondering what
happened today. I believe we owe you all an explanation."
"Yes!" said Erestor, sitting up straight and looking as if he meant to start taking notes.
"No," said Thranduil calmly. "Speak of it only if you would, Elrond. What passed in the
glen was between you and Amroth and Nimrodel. It is no business of the rest of us."
"I think it is in part my business," said Arwen haughtily, lifting her chin, "And perhaps
Orophin's as well."
"I do not mind speaking of what passed," Amroth said quietly.
"Nor do I," said Elrond, "But I thank you, Thranduil, for your discretion."
Thranduil nodded and sat back. Haldir thought he saw as much eagerness in his eyes as in
anyone else's, but he admired the Elvenking's tact -- something he was not generally
known for. Elrond looked at Amroth and the lost king nodded, so the Lord of Imladris
took a deep breath and addressed the group.
"Nimrodel is no more than a spirit. She is ever-bound to this wood, the stream, and
particularly to the glade."
Arwen gasped. "Should we not attempt to set her free?"
Elrond shook his head slowly. "I do not believe she suffers, and the price to free her is too
high."
"What price is that?" breathed Orophin.
"She asked for my life," said Amroth quietly.
"And you would have given it to her," Elrond added.
"Yes," said Amroth, "But understand that I do not think I owe it to her."
"So you would have given it out of love…" Orophin said, sounding sad.
"I would have given it out of the memory of love. The love I bear now is not for her. She
knew that. So should you, my Orophin." Amroth smiled at Haldir's brother and Orophin's
ears turned pink. Haldir could not help smiling himself.
"She asked also that I be the one to sacrifice Amroth," Elrond said. "This I would not do,
whether he wished it or no."
"As you should not!" said Erestor, a look of horror striking his face.
"And so, do you leave her here?" Arwen asked. "Bound forever?"
"This place has always been a place of healing, a place of purity," Haldir said quietly. "We
all felt it when we slept, and we all slept even after being attacked. The orcs could not
cross the stream because of her presence. She is a good spirit here."
"She belongs here," said Legolas suddenly. "I can feel it."
"I trust that you all believe that I would not leave her here did I think she was in torment,"
said Elrond. "Her only torment has been, perhaps, our presence. We will return to Lórien
at dawn and leave her to peace."
"Yes, and then you have a wedding to plan," Thranduil said, grinning at Elrond. "The
joining of your daughter to Rúmil of Lórien is sure to be the social event of the century."
Haldir looked at Rúmil. His brother looked awfully pale. Rúmil and Arwen were holding
hands, but Arwen spoke calmly.
"Rúmil and I have decided to postpone the wedding."
Haldir arched an eyebrow. "Postpone?"
"Postpone indefinitely," Rúmil said hastily.
"And we may decide to see other elves for a while," Arwen added lightly.
"Both of us, or just you?" Rúmil asked suspiciously.
Arwen laughed and kissed him on the mouth. "You are free, my love," she said. "Just do
not forget me."
"That would be like forgetting that the sky is blue," Rúmil said. He kissed Arwen and the
two of them probably would have fallen to the ground had not Elrond cleared his throat.
"What will you do, when you return to Caras Galadhon?" Erestor asked Amroth.
"I will ask Galadriel for permission to stay," Amroth said.
"She will give it," said Elrond confidently. "She would not make you leave your home."
"Will this not cause a conflict?" Thranduil wondered. "Will the elves of the Golden Wood
follow the Lady of Light or will they look to the lost king to return to power?"
"I have no wish for power. I wish merely to live quietly. I will forsake the name of
Amroth, King of the Golden Wood, and take a new name. I will begin a new life," Amroth
said.
Thranduil nodded. This seemed to please him. "You are wise," he said.
Orophin looked delighted. He said nothing, but Haldir knew that his younger brother
could be nothing but pleased. Oro would have his love. Rúmil would have his freedom.
Only Haldir would be left alone when Legolas departed. Suddenly the thought, which he
had been trying to ignore and drive back, seemed overwhelming. He stood up without a
word to anyone and slipped off into the wood, needing a moment to hide his emotions
from the others.
Haldir found himself by the stream under the moonlight. He gazed up at the stars, hung
serenely in the velvet of the sky. His heart ached in his chest. He tried not to feel sorry for
himself, but he did. He told himself again and again that the distance would not change
their love, but he still dreaded all the lonely nights he saw stretching out before him, nights
in which Legolas would only be as a dream to him. Nights like the past century had held
for him.
A gentle touch fell on his arm. He knew Legolas was there beside him without having to
look, but look he did. Haldir's eyes met the azure gaze of his lover. Legolas' expression
was calm and steady, but there was concern in it as well.
"I know why you hide."
"I suppose you do, Legolas."
"Do you mean to cut it off between us again, to treat me coldly so I will not miss you?"
"No…"
"Good. It did not work, anyway."
Legolas slipped his arms around Haldir and Haldir could not resist holding the young
prince. The lithe body pressed against him was stirring. He wanted to fall down in the
grass and take Legolas right there. Perhaps he would. He bent and licked the tip of
Legolas' pointed ear and felt him tremble.
"I love you, Prince of Mirkwood," he said in a low voice.
"I love you back, Marchwarden of Lórien," Legolas said, his voice husky. "Thranduil
wishes to return home soon, but he has given me leave to stay in Caras Galadhon for as
long as Galadriel will allow it."
Joy filled Haldir's heart. "Truly?"
"Yes. I will have to go home eventually, I imagine, but at least we will have some time…
Thranduil believes the Galadhrim might take a lesson from my archery skills," Legolas
added, laughing.
"I should like to be present when you tell that to Lord Celeborn," Haldir said.
"I can only imagine what he will do when I tell him I am the best shot in Middle-earth,"
Legolas said, but Haldir knew he was teasing.
"Let me show you what I am the best in Middle-earth at," Haldir said, bending to kiss
Legolas' throat. Legolas shivered in his arms.
"Yes," he said, "Show me, show me as often as you can."
Together they lay down in the grass, and Haldir was grateful that they would not be
separated from each other any time soon. They might not be able to spend every moment
of eternity together, but eternity was a long time. Again he was reminded of how
important the present was. He needed to stop worrying so much about what lay ahead.
Haldir brought his mouth to Legolas' and stopped thinking, for a time, altogether.
[the end]
