Part Twenty-One
Haldir was not angry at Rúmil. Well, perhaps he was a tiny bit irritated with his youngest
sibling, but not nearly as incensed as he was with Legolas. Haldir expected this sort of
behavior from Rúmil, but he had thought that Legolas was above it. It was cold, kissing
his own brother in his own bed. It hurt, Haldir thought as he stomped down the stairs. It
hurt a lot.
Maybe Legolas was paying him back for the cruel treatment Haldir had given him all those
years ago. Maybe all his talk of desire, and wanting what the present could offer them, and
even his giving of himself had been false. It had been to lure Haldir into a false sense of
hope before crushing his heart ruthlessly. It was a plot worthy of Thranduil. Perhaps
Legolas was his father's son after all.
This was why he stayed away from romantic entanglements. This was why he took no one
to his bed, and stayed clear of most of those he was invited into. This was why he did not
lie with Galadriel, or Celeborn. He was bleeding inside, and he hated himself for his foolish
sentimentality.
He knew not where he was going as he walked away from his tree. He ought to report to
Galadriel, he supposed, but she would know immediately what had happened and he truly
did not wish to discuss it with her. Perhaps he would go check on the border patrol. He
was not in uniform, but perhaps a surprise visit from the Marchwarden would do his
watchers some good. The long walk would do him some good.
He wondered if he could get away with skipping the banquet tonight. He did not want to
see them, especially not if they were together. It would be difficult enough tomorrow
when they all three went on the quest in search of Nimrodel. Perhaps he ought to leave
Rúmil behind to deal with Celeborn. If he wanted to be free with his affections, let he give
them to the Lord of Lórien. In Haldir's opinion, they deserved each other.
Then again, he knew that this would be reckless. Rúmil would no doubt find his way into
deeper trouble, and the last event Haldir wanted was for Galadriel to become angry with
any of them. He really needed to speak to her and make sure he would even be permitted
to have his brothers accompany them, but he felt certain that this would present no
problem. Surely she could see the situation as well as he could.
His anger had scarcely cooled when he reached the border, and he was tough on the elves
who were watching it now. He barked and yelled at them, regardless of whether they
deserved such treatment. He looked for fault in them. There was little to be found, which
was satisfying on one level but neglected to help him release his anger. Finally Fereveldir,
who was leader of this patrol group, pulled Haldir aside and demanded to know what was
going on.
Refusing to feel badly about it, as he was suffering enough already, Haldir simply
complimented Fereveldir on his excellent work and stomped back off into the forest. He
might as well go home and change for the banquet. As he grew closer and closer to Caras
Galadhon, more and more did attending the banquet feel like a sentence of death. With a
burst of dread, Haldir sprinted up the stairs to Galadriel's talan. He had to at least ask to
be excused.
There were many elves streaming in and out of the receiving platform where Galadriel and
Celeborn were both issuing last minute orders and having things sent to the Great Hall in
the next mallorn over, which was connected to their tree by a small bridge. When
Galadriel saw Haldir, she frowned. Swiftly she approached the Marchwarden and drew
him aside.
"You look terrible," she said, touching his cheek with the palm of her hand. "I hope you
intend to change your clothing before the banquet."
"Lady Galadriel," Haldir said, taking a deep breath.
"Did you speak harshly to Fereveldir?"
"Well, I--"
"He does not deserve such treatment."
"I know," Haldir sighed.
"You are not permitted to take our your own woes on others."
"Forgive me." Haldir looked down at his boots.
"I should suspend you from your post."
Haldir lifted his head and raised an eyebrow. "Would you?"
Galadriel quirked the corner of her mouth. "It would serve as a lesson to you. I should
make Rúmil Marchwarden for a few days. It would serve as a lesson to him as well."
Haldir could not suppress the scowl that immediately stamped itself on his face. "Rúmil!"
Galadriel nodded slowly, then frowned again. "Truly?"
"Truly, what?" Sometimes her ability to read his heart irritated him as much as it did
Celeborn. She spoke as if she expected him to know of what she was speaking.
"You are upset with Rúmil. This is rare."
Haldir tried to blank the vision off Legolas and Rúmil together from his mind, not wanting
her to see it. It was petty and childish, and he suddenly felt very small for being angry with
either of them. After all, he and Legolas were not life-mates and never would be. He had
no cause to be angry with Rúmil. He just was not used to feeling this way. Trying not to
think about it only made the whole scene replay in his heart, and he knew then that it was
not hidden from Galadriel.
"May I be excused from tonight's festivities? I would prefer to get a good night's rest
before we leave tomorrow," he said, attempting to keep all emotion from his tone.
"This is what you have come to ask me?"
"Yes. I think it would be for the best."
"In that, you are wrong," Galadriel said lightly. She laid her hand on his arm. "I fully
expect you to attend the banquet tonight. Bathe first, then dress in your finest."
"I bathed this morning."
"Do it again."
Haldir felt dimly offended, but he rather enjoyed bathing so he decided that following this
order would do more good than harm. Perhaps Galadriel knew this. "Very well."
"There is something else."
He had nearly forgotten. "Yes. I wish to ask that Orophin… and Rúmil… be assigned to
come on the journey with me. I do not wish to leave them behind."
"I understand, and I grant this request."
"Thank you, my lady."
"It may interest you to know that Amroth came to me this afternoon with the same
request."
Haldir frowned. "Just for Orophin, I suppose."
"No, for both."
"Then Oro asked him to include Rúmil as well."
"Perhaps, but it matters not. I would have sent them in any event," Galadriel said with a
pointed look at Lord Celeborn.
Haldir smiled. He remembered that he had seen Erestor leaving Galadriel's talan at dawn
and almost mentioned this, but bit his tongue. He did not know all the facts. It was best to
remain silent. "You are wise in all things," he said softly.
"Yes, I am, and you would do well to remember it, Haldir," Galadriel said in a light tone.
She seemed to be teasing, but he knew that she meant it. "Now, go and wash."
For a moment he felt the temptation to ask her to come with him, but he refrained. She
saw the thought in his eyes, however, and smiled deeply. "Do not judge Rúmil and
Legolas too harshly," she said in a low voice. Haldir felt heat sting his cheeks. He truly did
not wish to discuss this with her. "They have suffered this day as well, and neither of them
means you any harm."
"Suffered? What do you mean, they have suffered?"
"I choose to let them reveal their own actions to you if they desire. You are correct in
thinking that we should not discuss this together."
Haldir nodded, but he felt slightly frustrated. Should he speak to Legolas, demand an
explanation? It would be so humiliating to do so. He did not wish to wear his heart on the
sleeve of his tunic for all to see. Besides, he would not do anything in front of Thranduil.
That would be entirely too dangerous.
"Yes," said Galadriel. "Give Lord Thranduil no quarrel with Lothlórien, if you please. I
trust in your discretion." Haldir wished vaguely that she would stop reading his thoughts,
and this made her laugh. "Off to the baths with you, then. I will see you tonight. Perhaps
you will dance with me."
"Certainly," Haldir replied. "And…thank you, my lady."
Galadriel pressed her lips gently against Haldir's cheek. "You are very dear to me, Haldir,"
she said. Before he could express his surprise, she went back to her duties. Haldir looked
over at Celeborn but he had not even a glance to space for the Marchwarden, so busy was
he giving orders. Haldir turned and left, heading for the bathing pool, wondering what the
odds were that it would be empty.
It was not. Haldir raised an eyebrow when he saw Amroth and Elrond sitting together in
the water, talking quietly. They looked up when he arrived, both of their expressions
grave.
"Where have you been?" Elrond asked without preamble.
Haldir raised the other brow, unaccustomed to being addressed this way by the Lord of
Imladris. Slowly he began removing his clothing and folding it rather more neatly than it
deserved, as rumpled as it already was. "I went to check my march," he said. He looked at
Amroth and recalled that he had been going up the stairs with Orophin and Arwen when
Haldir had been going down them. Had he seen Rúmil and Legolas together? Did he know
of Haldir's humiliation? Had he or Arwen told Elrond? Was Elrond jealous?
"Did the long walk cool your anger?" Amroth asked intuitively.
"Not as well as I would have liked," Haldir admitted, slipping into the water. Perhaps he
would make this a quick bath. He did not wish to speak with either of them about this.
"Have you been back to your talan?" Elrond asked sharply.
"I went to speak with Lady Galadriel when I returned, then she sent me here. I mean only
to wash quickly, then dress for the banquet. It will begin within the hour," Haldir pointed
out. "Is there something you wish to say to me, Lord Elrond?"
"I think you should tell him what happened," Amroth commented.
"What happened?" Haldir asked, frowning.
Elrond took a deep breath. "Rúmil and Legolas took a powdered herb from your room
meant to cure the effects off too much alcohol. They neglected to mix it with water,
however and over-dosed themselves."
Haldir's eyes opened wide and he could not catch his breath. Yes, that was exactly the
foolish sort of thing Rúmil would do. "Legolas did not tell me his head pained him," he
said helplessly. "I would have fetched him water, and Rúmil as well."
"Be calm, Haldir. I have seen to them. They are well. They will not even miss the
banquet," Elrond said.
"Does Thranduil know?"
"We did not think he would take pleasure in the knowledge of where his son spent last
night," said Elrond.
"Or the morning with my brother?" Haldir growled.
"What you saw may have been the effect of the herb, Haldir," Amroth said calmly.
"I have never known it to have that effect."
"You have never taken it without water," Elrond said.
Haldir nodded. He knew not what to think of this. Could it be that what he had seen had
been innocent enough in nature, born of stupidity and dry herbs? This must have been
what Galadriel had been speaking of when she had advised him not to judge them harshly.
"You should speak to each of them," Amroth said. "Anger will do none of you any good."
"I appreciate your concern," Haldir said through gritted teeth.
He ducked himself under the water, then got out of the pool, picking up his clothing and
heading back for his talan without bothering to put it on. Luckily, no one saw him during
his trek, or surely they would have said that the Marchwarden had gone mad. Not dressing
turned out to be a mistake, however, since Arwen was sitting on his bed when he entered
his room. Haldir felt his temper flare. So be it. If she wished to invade his privacy, then let
her see.
He glared at her for one long moment, but said nothing. Finally he threw his rumpled
clothing of yesterday on the bed next to her, watching her eyes widen. He turned away
and began going through his trunk to find his dress robes.
"Legolas--" she said, but he cut her off without turning around.
"Do not speak to me of Legolas."
"Well, Rúmil--"
"Or of Rúmil."
"Then what would you have me say to you?" she snapped, her temper flaring to match his.
He turned around and looked at her, holding the clothing he meant to put on in his hand.
"I would rather I had not found you in my room. I have spoken to your father. I know that
Legolas and Rúmil took that herb. That is enough of the story."
"Would you not like to know what Legolas said--"
"No!"
Arwen grinned at him cheekily. "I like the sight of you unclothed, Haldir."
"Thank you," Haldir muttered. He pulled the robe over his head, then turned away to find
his brush.
"Will you let me brush your hair?"
"No."
"Will you escort me to the banquet tonight?"
“I thought I had heard that you were in love with Rúmil,” he commented.
“I am! But I would rather attend this banquet with you. I would explain why, but the
explanation would be lengthy and you have already expressed your desire not to speak of
Rúmil. So, will you escort me, or shall I explain it?”
He sighed. "I will escort you if you wish." He supposed he would not be entirely adverse
to her company. At least he would have an excellent dancing partner, and she could be
entertaining if she kept the conversation to a topic besides gossip about the Prince of
Mirkwood and his brother.
"Wonderful. You must meet me at my talan in half an hour’s time!" Arwen jumped up
from Haldir's bed and ran out of the room.
Haldir sighed. So much for being punctual tonight.
